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LANGUAGE HUMOR AT ITS FINEST
Making yourself more proficient in English need not be a drag. You can actually speed up the learning process and make it fun by generously lacing it with humor—but preferably the best that the English language can offer.
In this new section, apart from giving a fixed slot to our weekly “In a Lighter Vein” pop-out humor piece in the Forum homepage, we have put together the finest of those weekly humor pop-ups since the Forum started. The best of them—collected from various sources on the web and sent in by friends—are all here, posted in the Forum under the following headings: Wordplay, On the Job, Student and School Life, and Miscellany.
So if you missed any of the best of the Forum’s weekly humor pop-ups, you can enjoy and savor them again and again here—and better still, share them with your friends!
Click here to go to the board (requires registration to post)
Choice Bits of Modern Wisdom
After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: when you’re full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
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If you find yourself in a hole the first thing to do is stop diggin’.
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Never smack a man who’s chewin’ tobacco.
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It doesn’t take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
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Never follow good whiskey with water, unless you’re out of good whiskey.
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If you get to thinkin’ you’re a person of some influence, try orderin’ somebody else’s dog around.
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Don’t worry about bitin’ off more than you can chew. Your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger’n you think.
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Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.
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Always drink upstream from the herd.
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Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.
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If you’re ridin’ ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it’s still there.
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When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don’t be surprised if they learn their lesson.
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There’s two theories to arguin’ with a woman. Neither one works.
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When you're throwin’ your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.
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Lettin’ the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier ’n puttin’ it back.
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The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.
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A smart ass just don’t fit in a saddle.
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Never miss a good chance to shut up.
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50% of all Harvard MBA's graduated in the bottom half of their class.
—From the jokes collection of The Humor Bin
Go to Wordplay now!
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Go to Student and School Life now!
Go to Miscellany now!
