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LANGUAGE HUMOR AT ITS FINEST
Making yourself more proficient in English need not be a drag. You can actually speed up the learning process and make it fun by generously lacing it with humor—but preferably the best that the English language can offer.
In this new section, apart from giving a fixed slot to our weekly “In a Lighter Vein” pop-out humor piece in the Forum homepage, we have put together the finest of those weekly humor pop-ups since the Forum started. The best of them—collected from various sources on the web and sent in by friends—are all here, posted in the Forum under the following headings: Wordplay, On the Job, Student and School Life, and Miscellany.
So if you missed any of the best of the Forum’s weekly humor pop-ups, you can enjoy and savor them again and again here—and better still, share them with your friends!
Click here to go to the board (requires registration to post)
Cynical Sentiments of the Bitter Half
1. “They were married for better or for worse. He couldn’t have done better and she couldn’t have done worse.”
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2. “It must have been ‘Love At First Sight.’ If she had taken a second look, she’d have turned and run.”
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3. “He’s made her so nervous she’s losing weight, but she won’t leave him. She’s waiting till he gets her down to 125 lbs.”
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4. “The only reason why she’s had nine children by him is that she’s trying to lose him in a crowd.”
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5. “He was her ideal before marriage—now he’s an ordeal.”
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6. “The doctor says she needs sea air, so he’s fanning her with a mackerel.”
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7. “He used to call her his cute little dish, now he calls her his cute little ‘dishwasher’.”
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8. “He needed a wife because sooner or later, something was bound to happen that he couldn't blame on the government.”
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9. “When she asks him for clothes money, he tells her to go to the best shops and pick some nice things—but for her not to get caught.”
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10. “He hasn’t paid any attention to her in years, but he’ll shoot any man who does.”
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11. “Once a cyclone ripped their roof off and whirled them a half mile through the air. It was the first time in years they were out together.”
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12. “He’s the perfect gentleman. When she drops something, he kicks it to where she can pick it up easier.”
—From the AngelFire.com website
Go to Wordplay now!
Go to On the Job now
Go to Student and School Life now!
Go to Miscellany now!
