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LANGUAGE HUMOR AT ITS FINEST
Making yourself more proficient in English need not be a drag. You can actually speed up the learning process and make it fun by generously lacing it with humor—but preferably the best that the English language can offer.
In this new section, apart from giving a fixed slot to our weekly “In a Lighter Vein” pop-out humor piece in the Forum homepage, we have put together the finest of those weekly humor pop-ups since the Forum started. The best of them—collected from various sources on the web and sent in by friends—are all here, posted in the Forum under the following headings: Wordplay, On the Job, Student and School Life, and Miscellany.
So if you missed any of the best of the Forum’s weekly humor pop-ups, you can enjoy and savor them again and again here—and better still, share them with your friends!
Click here to go to the board (requires registration to post)
Written or spoken in English-as-Second-Language placement tests
English being not an easy language, something that’s close to what you might want to say could mean something completely different. Consider the following statements actually written or spoken by takers of English-as-a-Second-Language placement tests.
Forum members are invited to try their hand correcting the grammar and syntax of these faulty bits of English. When you’re done, don’t be shy. You are most welcome to share your improved versions by posting them in the Forum.
“If not for the cell phones, we would still not know where we are at.”
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“I felt the happiest woman on Earth at the time.”
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“I came to the conclusion that apart from myself, I don’t have any talents.”
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“New Mexico are my best experience or best times I never had.”
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“I hate to see people sad or angry because you only get one life so why waste it on retarted stuff.”
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“If you seat down and wash TV all time, you get fat.”
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“We could talk, eat snakes and laugh.”
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“Sometimes television’s programation has bad bad quality of programs.”
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“I was a prodigy of a teenage pregnancy.”
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“In conclusion, television affects my life by not getting a part-time job in the afternoon.”
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“In the 18th century, there weren’t many television programs designed for children.”
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“Travel is an activity that makes me feel another person.”
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“T.V. could be bad too because you could go more blinder.”
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“I recently gave birth to a gorgeous and healthy five-month-old baby girl.”
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“Just feeling the cool breeze going through my face.”
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“A world without television is a world without knowing, and without television there would be no famous people.”
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“I use my dancing skills at clubs, churches, and AA gatherings.”
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“History deeply amuses, from the Ice Age to the war in Iraq.”
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“I came to the conclusion that apart from myself, I don’t have any talents.”
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“On top of her, I have a pretty big family.”
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“Anyone can laugh at a good joke or enjoy watching a friend trip.”
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“When I’m in my nursing home and some detestable scoundrel dares to steal my pudding, you know I’ll be willing to throw down.”
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“Cell phones evolutionated the industry of communication.”
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“The calming crash of the waves against the rocks screamed serenity.”
—From the “Language Barrier” collection of Rinkworks.com
Go to Wordplay now!
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Go to Student and School Life now!
Go to Miscellany now!
