Jose Carillo's English Forum
General Category => Language Humor at its Finest => Topic started by: Joe Carillo on May 29, 2011, 09:19:34 PM
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Top 10 Murphy’s Laws and Its 8 Corollaries
(http://josecarilloforum.com/imgs/murphy's-law_asstooheavy-1A.png)
We all know the basic Murphy's Law—“If anything can go wrong it will”—so we'll cut through the chase and take up right away its top 10 fundamental ramifications and 8 corollaries. Here they go:
1. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
(http://josecarilloforum.com/imgs/murphy's-law_you've-overlooked-something-1A.png)
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2. If anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway.
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3. Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
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4. Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value.
(http://josecarilloforum.com/imgs/murphy's-law-damage-to-matter-1A.png)
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5. The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
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6. The buddy system is essential to your survival; it gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at.
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7. Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand.
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8. The opulence of the front office decor varies inversely with the fundamental solvency of the firm.
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9. Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he’ll have to touch to be sure.
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10. The first myth of management is that it exists.
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Eight Corollaries to Murphy’s Laws
1. 1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
(http://josecarilloforum.com/imgs/murphy's-law-light-travels-faster-1A.png)
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2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
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3. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t.
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4. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
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5. The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first.
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6. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
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7. Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.
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8. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don’t have film.
(http://josecarilloforum.com/imgs/murphy's-law-photographic-memory-1A5.png)
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—From the You-Can-Be-Funny.com website (http://www.you-can-be-funny.com/Funny-Top-Ten-Lists.html)