« on: April 02, 2011, 09:01:02 PM »
40 Puns on the JobYou'll surely have fun reading these 40 puns on the job. If you don't, it's either you don't know your English that well or you don't have any sense of humor at all, or maybe both. There's really no shame in finding out which of the three you are, because it will spare you the trouble of trying to be punny and being met with baleful faces all the time. (Just kidding!)1. “It’s true that the Earth rotates, but scientists are always putting their own spin on it.”
***
2. “He who makes false teeth is an indentured laborer.”
***
3. “I really do have a photographic memory—I just haven’t developed it yet.”
***
4. “A guy became so good with a chainsaw that he was promoted to branch manager.”
***
5 “He had a photographic memory that was never developed.”
***
6. “The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.”
***
7. “In the office she was frantically looking for her false nails, only to discover she had filed them away.” - egostate - Derby,UK
***
8. “If you give some managers an inch they think they’re a ruler.”
***
9. “Two pencils decided to have a race. The outcome was a draw.” - Plasmapitch
***
10. “He bent over to pick up a sieve and strained himself.”
***
11. “If ionized fertilizer is delivered after business hours, the nitrate will be charged.” - Kap'n Klystron - Nanuet, NY
***
12 “The inept mathematician couldn’t count on his friends.”
***
13. “Every calendar’s days are numbered.”
***
14. “The plumber had to quit his job because it was too much of a drain.” - B-ron - Edmonton
***
15. “Pencils could be made with erasers at both ends, but what would be the point?” - Kap'n Klystron - Nanuet, NY
***
16. “The telegraph operator who accidentally sent the same message twice was remorseful. - For Better or Wurst - Toledo, Ohio
***
17. “An office with many people and few electrical outlets could be in for a power struggle.”
***
18. “The mime wanted to say something, but he wasn’t aloud.”
***
19. “While training to work at Coca Cola he was given a pop quiz.”
***
20. “The optician fell into the lens grinding machine and made a spectacle of himself.”
***
21. “The fence builders were upset with their working conditions, so they started to picket. - tim lobovitch
***
22. “I’ve tried numerous times to apply myself, but nothing seems to stick.” - Jim - New York
***
23. “How could I trust the ceiling fan installer when I knew he was always screwing up?”
***
24. “No one ever wants to babysit the naughty atom, they always have to keep an ion it. - Ninja Stealth
***
25. “Swimming instructors are always getting immersed in their work.”
***
26. “The untruthful deli clerk was full of baloney.” - Yehuda Hamer
***
27. “Small people are in short supply.”
***
28. “Meetings - where we take minutes and waste hours.”
***
29. “Working as an elevator operator has its ups and downs.”
***
30. “At some executive meetings there is a chairman of the bored.”
***
31. “The personal trainer quit his job because it wasn't working out.”
***
32. “He rose through the ranks of the International Corn Growers association, eventually becoming a kernel.” - kaatgp - FL
***
33. “I do a lot of spreadsheets in the office so you can say I’m excelling at work.” - The Big Pun - Nairobi, Kenya
***
34. “An electrician is a bright spark who knows what's watt.” - Scrabble817 - Woking, England
***
35. “In the air duct installers union they have lots of opportunity to vent.”
***
36. “When the mayor wanted to slash the budget he turned to a fund razor.”
***
37. “Some people find fire drills quite Alarming.”
***
38. “At a job interview, I decided to lie and say I had experience as an illusionist and as a window cleaner. They saw right through me.” - ConeArtist - London
***
39. “The man who worked at the watch factory was very funny. He stood about all day making faces.” - Jossy - Australia
***
40. “After working for 24 hours straight he called it a day.”—From the Pun of the Day website
« Last Edit: January 12, 2023, 09:35:38 AM by Joe Carillo »
Logged
