30 of the Most Humorous Quotables You'd Come By These Worrisome Days“The law of heredity is that all undesirable traits come from the other parent.”—
Unknown IMAGE CREDIT: SCIENCETREK.ORGOops! This is an authentic schematic diagram of a DNA and chromosome, silly!
“If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.”—
Doug Larson***
“Government is like junior high. Your status depends upon whom you’re able to persecute.”—
Jonathan Kellerman***
“A smart person knows all the rules so he can break them wisely.”—
Lubna Azmi***
“Forgive your enemies—if you can’t get back at them any other way.”—
Franklin P. Jones***
“I don’t at all like knowing what people say of me behind my back. It makes me far too conceited.”—
Oscar Wilde***
“How I see it is that men get one night of pleasure, and we get nine months of putting them through hell and getting away with it.”—
Sara Swank***
“It’s a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water.”—
Franklin P. Jones***
“Every man is a fool for at least five minutes every day; wisdom consists of not exceeding the limit.”—
Elbert Hubbard***
“I sometimes wonder if the manufacturers of foolproof items keep a fool or two on their payroll to test things.”—
Alan Coren***
“My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.”—
Ashleigh Brilliant***
“Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.”—
Scott Adams ***
“The secret of managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided.”—
Casey Stengal***
“I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception.”—
Groucho Marx***
“The best time to give advice to your children is while they’re still young enough to believe you know what you're talking about.”—
Unknown***
“The trouble with jogging is that by the time you realize you’re not in shape for it, it’s too far to walk back.”—
Franklin Jones***
“A word to the wise isn’t necessary; it is the stupid ones who need all the advice.”—
Bill Cosby***
“Mobile phones are the only subject on which men boast about who's got the smallest.”—
Neil Kinnock ***
“You’ve reached middle age when all you exercise is caution.”—
Unknown***
“No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes she were not.”—
H.L. Mencken***
“Some people are alive only because it is illegal to kill them.”—
Unknown***
“Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want.”—
Tori Filler***
“Have no fear of perfection—you’ll never reach it.”—
Salvador Dali***
“Nothing is so embarrassing as watching someone do something that you said couldn’t be done.”—
Sam Ewing***
“Those who think they know everything are very annoying to those of us who do.”—
Terry Marchal***
“You know your children have grown up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they are going.”—
Unknown***
“Even more exasperating than the guy who thinks he knows it all is the one who really does.”—
Al Bernstein***
“Never miss a chance to keep your mouth shut.”—
Robert Newton Peck***
“I believe in rules. Sure I do. If there weren’t any rules, how could you break them?”—
Leo Duracher—From Amanda's Quotes and Poetry
