A Profusion of Oxymorons

[Joe Carillo]

A Profusion of Oxymorons

An oxymoron is a figure of speech in which opposite or contradictory ideas or terms are combined—sometimes with hilarious results.

Here are some prime examples of oxymorons for you to enjoy:

Act naturally

***
Happily married

***
Microsoft Works

***
Holy war

***
Found missing

***
Resident alien

***
Military intelligence

***
Minor catastrophe

***
Affordable housing

***
Near miss

***
Great depression

***
Canadian army

***
Phone sex

***
United Nations

***
Advanced BASIC

***
Genuine imitation

***
Death benefits

***
Airline Food

***
Women’s rights

***
Good grief

***
Same difference

***
Almost exactly

***
Sensitive man

***
Government organization

***
Everything except

***
Civil War

***
Good kid

***
Sanitary landfill

***
Alone together

***
Legally drunk

***
Silent scream

***
British fashion

***
Living dead

***
Small crowd

***
Business ethics

***
Soft rock

***
Butt Head

***
Software documentation

***
New York culture

***
New classic

***
Sweet sorrow

***
Child-proof

***
“Now, then”

***
Synthetic natural gas

***
Christian Scientists

***
Passive aggressive

***
Taped live

***
Clearly misunderstood

***
Peace force

***
Extinct Life

***
Temporary tax increase

***
New and improved

***
Computer jock

***
Plastic glasses

***
Terribly pleased

***
Computer security

***
Political science

***
Tight slacks

***
Definite maybe

***
Pretty ugly

***
Twelve-ounce pound cake

***
Diet ice cream

***
Rap music

***
Working vacation

***
Exact estimate

***
Religious tolerance

***
Freezer Burn

***
Honest Politician

***
Jumbo Shrimp

***
Loners Club

—ESL Humor - Jokes for English Language Learners