Candor of Reality
Whenever I hear the sweet tunes of the gray clouds, it makes me want to dance underneath its invigorating shower. “How long have you held this in, dear?” I whisper under my breath, pretending to embrace an entity of another plane. I listen to the sky’s heartbeat, as it allows the downpour to drench me in its warmth. I let the delightful rain flood my mind with thoughts. “This,” I say, “makes me happy.”
Fascinating, how a natural occurrence could mean so much to an individual. It was always there, and yet so many hold it with high regard. Take the rain, for instance. Some may call this bad weather; the eyes of numbed minds will conceive nothing but a monotonous beat; the broken will see a refuge; others will recall bittersweet memoirs. On another note, look at the Sun (not literally, lest you want your eyes to fall from grace). One may call it a star in the abysmal infinity of the Universe; others will call it the symbol of another day or a better tomorrow; some may see it as the light of Hope, and so on and so forth. The point is, we connect these older creations to the wellspring of emotions, and to the fountain of thoughts. We give these things life, just as God (according to the Bible, we’ll get to God later) breathed life into us. Isn’t it something so surreal? What is it they see in something that always has been and will be? These reasons are their own guilty pleasures, only to be shared by them and the seductive caress of the wind. But I know why, for the wind is my companion. And with her consent, I am allowed to reveal the truth.
We are, without a doubt, one of the most sophisticated simplicities in existence.
That’s it. What, were you expecting some grandiose ending? Were you expecting a pyromaniac’s dream sky filled with iridescent fireworks, illuminating the entirety of the night? Were you expecting a magical rainbow bridge that brought you to the end of a fairy-tale? Or, were you expecting some form of compensation to make sure every action and argument ever raised was validated? If you were expecting the first, then I have bad news for you; that’s not how it always goes, and it won’t go that way with this essay.
That is one truth. Life is not a fairy-tale. It isn’t fantasy. The Wind has more to say.
Life will not feed you with silver spoons. Life will not make you a princess or a king or a ruler. It will measure your resilience through horrendous examinations set upon the parameters of survival. People will learn that “Strength is the right of the strong,” in a morbid way; they will learn it through suffering. When they get through, Life will say with a smirk, “Congratulations.” They will no longer be what they used to be. Unless they have the willpower to truly endure the change which Life will force upon them, only then will they begin to judge the consequences rooted from their actions. Life is not sugar-sweet. It will haze your body and leave with it scars, but these scars are not made by Life itself; of course not, for Life cannot manifest as a sentient entity. Life will force its razor brush on your canvas to make you seethe the colors it wants you to seethe. Until agony and loneliness become your living brethren will Life stop pestering you.
Will you succumb to its blade? Many have already painted too much. And they now rest 6 layers below; slumbering in another world. Many of us thrive to ignore the light at the end of the tunnel. This is an undeniable truth for my brethren who have been gnawed on for so long by our dreaded, loyal ‘friend’: the black dog.
Some of us have eyes drawn to the stars. Where we see green, others will see red. So what exactly do some of the afflicted see at the end? And there it comes; a firefly. It’s tiny, alright, but its size never stopped it from dazzling the darkness with its shimmering light. It emerges from the light, hoping to reach out to the distraught afflicted.
“God?” many will whisper. “Not quite, but close enough,” a familiar voice will say with a chuckle. “I wish I were sometimes. But I’m not really fit to be God when the only thing that could bring you or me happiness is obliteration or human extinction.” “Or human suffering,” you’d reply with a smirk. And we would laugh. “I’m your friend, doofus.” I’d say with a big grin, and you’d reply with an even wider set of teeth. This makes me happy; getting to see that goofy smile on your face despite your skin deep lacerations.
Now, don’t get me wrong, many people find bliss in human suffering, most exclusively to circles of friends. Why? For one, their suffering empowers you to be happy, which will in-turn; give you an aura of joy. From there, you will influence your friends, who are currently suffering, with your happy aura. It’s quite the beautiful irony. One’s suffering will root to one’s own happiness, as a friend will be there.
Speaking of the trustworthy garrisons, there will always be that one grand cannon that will stand out from the rest; the rose among the daisies, the sunset amidst the great ocean… yes, the apple of your eye; the most exquisite tune that will float aloof in your ears despite the noise and static of this world. One may make his/her life’s mission to always put an enchanting smile on his/her beloved’s charming face, no matter how far apart they may be from each other. That is an unspeakable truth for some of us (yes, us, take it from a wandering soul) who are enthralled by the potent venom of ardent affection.
Life has a dark side, but it’s not always nightmares. Life is the Sun and the Moon.
There will always be a side to every coin, and there will be days or nights when you will have to stay on one side. Life isn’t always going to give you a heads up; you’ll need to accept the thumbs down, too. I lied about the grandiose ending. We were meant to burn so bright that we would someday outshine the sun and illuminate the lives of all around us. It doesn’t have to be a million degrees of separation nor heat. You need only share your moments of happiness, be it eating ice cream or pancit, playing your favorite sport, or immolating your enemies in a crimson bath of their own. So be it. Be an instrument in corrupting the veins of the afflicted. Inject the venom of temporary bliss into our bloodstreams. Do anything you can to allow the propaganda of happiness to spread the way abortionists, bigots, and anti-vaxxers would spread their own twisted propaganda. Defile our souls with the chaos of the impermanence of elation.
And if God wills it, it will be so. Fellow soul, God is never as silent as you think He is. He comes in the form of so many, hence many find Him in diversity; from the simple joys to the morose endings of books to the abysmal infinity of space. Religion will not save you. Hope will get you through, but faith will take you farther. This is one truth we must rejoice in. The Wind may grow quiet, but it does not mean it is no longer there. So, forgive me if I am now at a loss for words, for I have sacrificed a portion of unheard voices.
To end my rant, let it be another lie. I lied about the grandiose ending. Truth is, Life is worth living the more you strive to realize the value of temporary existence. Irony is the balancing principle of chaos, Sacrifice is the currency of the barter system, and Love is an engine which will keep you going.
