Author Topic: Romance Math & Miscellany  (Read 2206 times)

Joe Carillo

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Romance Math & Miscellany
« on: December 21, 2013, 08:35:55 AM »

I was copied this e-mail blast (except the above illustrative image) by Forum member Fred Natividad from Livonia, Michigan, several years back . Enjoy and/or grin and bear it!

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS:
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC:
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH:
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn’t need.
 
GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS:
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
 
HAPPINESS:
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

LONGEVITY:
Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
 
PROPENSITY TO CHANGE:
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.
 
DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE:
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

This one is Hilarious!
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED:

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, “You’re next.”

They stopped after I started doing the same to them... at funerals.

SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO SMART GUYS WHOM YOU KNOW CAN HANDLE IT.
« Last Edit: February 13, 2017, 08:57:49 AM by Joe Carillo »