20 Spot-on Political Quips for Our Times

[Joe Carillo]

20 Spot-on Political Quips for Our Times

“Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.” –Plato

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“The problem with political jokes is they get elected.” –Henry Cate, VII

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“There ought to be one day—just one—when there is open season on senators.” –Will Rogers

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“We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.” –Aesop

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“A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.” –George Bernard Shaw

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“Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner.” –James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)

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“No man’s life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session.” –Mark Twain (1866)

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“When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I’m beginning to believe it.” –Clarence Darrow

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“Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.” –Ronald Reagan

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“Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you.” –Author Unknown

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“I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them.” –Adlai Stevenson, campaign speech 1952

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“A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.” –Texas Guinan

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“Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other.” –Oscar Ameringer

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“If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these acceptance speeches, there wouldn’t be any inducement to go to heaven.” –Will Rogers

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“Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.” –Nikita Khrushchev

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“Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel.” –John Quinton

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“Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so.” –Gore Vidal

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“I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.” –Charles de Gaulle

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“Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.” –Doug Larson

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“Don’t vote; it only encourages them.” –Author Unknown

—From the Lifesmith Classic Fractals “Fun With the English Language” collection




NOTE: The four thematic visuals are recent additions by the Forum to this collection of quotes. (October 9, 2017)